Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Curses to Curtains

Oh I was living in fantasy land when I didn’t remember how terrible shopping for curtains was. Seriously you would think going through the curtain trenches two years ago, when we completely remodelled our house, I would remember... ahh selective memory HOW I LOATH THEE!!!!

So here we are two weeks to the close of escrow on the new house and I am just now allowing myself to really believe that this deal will go through, something that I wasn’t really counting on because you know loans can fall through, the seller could back out or something random could potentially fall from space and destroy this new house. What it happened to Donnie Darko; jet engine meet Donnie’s bedroom!

So I have been containing the excitement, or I should say I have been trying to contain the decorator beast that wants to let go and buy all the things I need for the new house. So I am attempting to just be chill about the whole thing, which means lots of wine. I know how you are not ‘supposed’ to think about real estate with your heart, you are ‘supposed’ to think about it with a little detachment as an investment; eyeroll... I so don’t know how to do ‘supposed’ anything! This is my house OF COURSE my heart is tied up with the things going on with my head, it’s just how I roll. Regardless a jet engine didn’t hit the new house yet (HURAH!), the loan is finally fully approved (more drama on that later), the inspection is done and with only two weeks left of escrow until we get the keys I am starting to get really really excited. T minus 15 days. Reminds me of the time I was 15 and my parents told me they were installing a new phone in my room, as in my own phone line (which I can now admit as an adult was as much as a gift to themselves so they could have a phone back as it was a gift to me) however I was SO EXCITED for that phone line I could barely contain my glee. YES that is the excitement I have now, that of a 15 year old girl who’s only worry in the world is how soon she can get her new phone line so she can call her friends and talk all day long without interruption. AHHHH youth, its wasted on the young.

But back to the point of this post. There is a huge concern with the new house, since it is brand new construction, there is absolutely nothing on the windows. No blinds, no curtains, not even any drapery hardware installed. So in the essence of not letting the new neighbours get to know me too fast too soon, excuse me neighbour while I take a shower, I had a window treatment company come out to meet me at the new house. They brought their fancy books of fabric choices and blind options and I had a field day picking out what I wanted and deciding what I liked. I felt really good about my choices, confident that everything would look so beautiful. That was I felt good until two days later, when I got the email with the quote for said beautiful pain free, someone will come out and install everything window treatments. WHAT!!!! Was that a number, for CURTAINS... there is no way window treatments should exceed $25,000 dollars. I knew hiring a company would be expensive but not “I’m gonna buy me a small country” expensive! I almost had a heart attack.

Yes there are 17 windows in the new house but do you know how many pairs of shoes I could get for $25,000? I am not buying a car I am buying window coverings!

So that idea got scrapped fast and I was back to the drawing board. I spent six hours researching curtains, desperately trying to weed through the internet to find some curtains that I loved. Alas everything sucked, sucked in a:

“Ooooh I love this pattern... crap they don’t have the sizes I need”


“Well these curtains are the right size but they are ugly!”

I was getting so frustrated I thought I would scream, but then I remembered that I had this same exact problem before, when I was trying to find curtains for my current home. My solution that time was to make the curtains myself. Yup that’s right, The Rogue Woman sews. My mother gifted me a new sewing machine, I bought some material, and then my mother and I went to town on the master bedroom curtains. It took me a ton of time to get them all finished but I did manage to make curtains for 11 different windows in my house.


And yes I already had the brilliant idea of just taking my nice hand-made curtains that I love with me to the new house. The problems comes in when the new ceilings are 10 foot ceilings a good two feet taller than my current home, which means that the windows are that much higher from the ground. The ceiling height and the fact that the window sizes for the new home are vastly different resulted in me coming to the very slow, very painful, very already made this agonizing decision before you bonehead, to sew curtains for all the rooms in the new house.

Of course it will take me some time; I will have to squeeze it in between everything else that is currently on my plate. GASPING FOR AIR HERE FOLKS. I figured taking 7 hours per window to sew the curtains and with 17 windows it will only take me 119 hours, which means that I estimate I will be done sometime in the next 5 years. In the mean time Mr. Rogue may have an aneurism, he who hates the windows uncovered because everyone is watching him. We will put up some sheets to cover the windows in the rooms we use the most but Mr. Rogue isn’t going to be getting any sleep until the new curtains are sewn and installed in every single room.


Jess said...

Aren't you glad that you have two handy dandy pinning friends who enjoy a good project who at least one may have freetime in the upcoming weeks to help you in your curtain craze? ;)

paul peggy zeus said...

WAY to much math. I know you'll find the perfect fit.

lilmansworld said...

that's a lot of windows! don't envy you or your bank account

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