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Saturday, June 4, 2011

BBBS 42: I Blinked and then She Was 13

I have been a Big for Big Brothers Big Sisters for a little over three years now. My little brings such a fabulous light to my life and she is growing up. Every year for her (and her twin’s) birthday we go to Disneyland. It seems only a short while ago that I was struggling to connect with her, now she is part of my family.

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Having children in my life, even if they are not my own, bring such weightlessness. I know it’s hard for me sometimes to keep to commitments made, to make sure I carve out enough time for her, to assure her that I am always here. There are moments when I wish to take a break, where I may be too tired to feel like picking her up… but those moments always wash away when I see her. Spending time with her I think is just as good as good for me as spending time with my therapist.

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Seeing the world through a child’s eyes. Rediscovering simple joys, learning through them the happiness of the moment, of living in the now, of not worrying about yesterday or tomorrow;

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Disneyland and children leave no room for all those silly adult things. Things like plans, agendas and a heavy heart.

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I started out today miserable. I did not want to go to Disney I wanted to sit at home and cry. I did not want to put forth the effort to run around a child’s paradise with hundreds of smiling faces. I went only because I made a promise to a little girl and breaking promises is unacceptable.

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You know what, I found my happy with her and with Disneyland.

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I found a smile for that moment, I forgot for a few minutes about tomorrow and yesterday. I held onto a merry go round and felt the breeze on my face. I smiled.

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Oh and it was cool to see the new Star Tours attraction everyone was raving about.

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This is our third birthday at Disney anniversary. The girls have gotten so big, I can see them pushing and growing into themselves and I am so happy that I have my little in my life.

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DISNEY 11th BIRTHDAY 2009

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DISNEY 13th BIRTHDAY 2011

2 comments:

lilmansworld said...

you are the BEST Big sister on the planet!

paul peggy zeus said...

kids do grow up quickly. One moment their little and the next, BAM they're all grown up. So glad you find happiness with your little.

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