Thursday, April 2, 2009

Cruise Director

It is amazing how one little word can bring up memories that you have not thought about in years. I am a planner, I was born a planner and I will always be a planner. I also like to take control of situations and I like things to be organized. So the reason that I take control of situations is not because I want to it is more because that is the only way it can be, for me anyways. Because I am a control freak and things just have to be my way. This behavior is nothing new to my family. I unfortunately uttered the phrase as a young child to my two neighborhood childhood "If you don't play my way we are not playing at all.". Now this would not be so bad, because I probably would have never remembered making a comment like that when I was so young, but unfortunately I said this within hearing of my mother. I have never lived that moment down. I have tried as I have gotten older and more mature to step back a bit and not be so bullheaded about how things have to be my way or the highway. But it has been a long road and I am VERY far from being cured.

I remember the first time I really noticed that I was a little more bold and organized than other kids. We were on vacation, one of those Disney cruises where you get to take your kids and let them loose on the boat supervised of course by overworked interns who’s hell on earth was to decide to work on that stupid boat. Anyways it was the first day of the trip and I went to the orientation for young adults group. I was 15 and I remember being excited to be called a young adult. When I walked into the room there were a ton of kids milling about. No one really knew each other and people all turned their heads and looked at me. Now most teens my age would be self conscious about walking into a room full of people that they don’t know. Not me. Now I am paraphrasing here but I said hello to the whole room, I introduced myself and then I asked everyone to sit down and say their name and where they were from, I of course started. We were almost to the last kid in the group to speak when a frazzled woman bounced through the door stumbling over apologies because she was held up and that is why she was late. She introduced herself as the teen director and then asked us to go around the room and state our names and where we were from. The kids were confused, "we had already done that" one kid said, then he pointed to me "she already took us through that drill." The teen leader turned to me and said "Who are you". I smiled and introduced myself and that is how I got the nickname from the other kids 'cruise director'.

All of these things came up to me last night when I was out with my girlfriends from my S class. We were talking about the last get together that they had thrown. A get together that I missed because of my grandfathers funeral. Ms. Eden was adorable, she told me "It just was not the same without you, nothing was organized, we needed you." It feels good when your friends recognize your talents and really feel it when you are not there. I am the one that gets the bill when a group of friends goes out so I can tally who owes what, I am the one that plans the menu when a group of us get together, and I am also the one that likes to plan trips and fun little mini vacations. It is just who I am. Last night we planned two get together’s and Ms. Eden and I organized most of the details. That is when the 'cruise director' nickname came out again to describe me. I accept it because that is just the type of person that I am. One day I can see myself taking over my old folk friends at the retirement home managing the bingo games, cheating on my meds, deciding who gets to work the puzzle next, protesting against the thin abrasive toilet paper that gave my lily white butt a rash, and basically ruling the roost until the day I die.

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