Could Be Why I Find Myself Licking the Floor

Recently Mr. Rogue and I went to Target, the Mecca of all that is wonderful and great in retail shopping. Aside from the fact that we just like to go and leisurely walk through the isles throwing things we don’t really need into the cart for the sheer pleasure of being there, that day we were actually on a mission. Since we now have an adult house, since we have an adult super cool kitchen and since we went through everything we own to decide what we really needed to register for to fill in the missing pieces of what we own I realized that I could not go another day with the mismatched chipped every day drinking glasses that we had. I could not register for them and wait eight months until I got it as a wedding present my head was ready to implode from the ugliness of it all.
Hence the Target trip and my wonderful euphoria drinking out of my new glasses over the past two days. That euphoria lasted until about a month longer when today I realized that my wonderfully beautiful new glasses were getting a layer of film on them and hard water stains on its once shiny sparkly surfaces. I was so disgusted that this was happening, and then that disgust turned into chaotic denial because that cannot be the same water that I clean with, that I wash the shampoo out of my hair with, that I wash daily scrub my face with, that just CANNOT BE. I would not be surprised if these hard water stains coat every hair follicle, covering what is supposed to be beautiful natural cover girl hair with a thin layer of hard water stain nastiness. And then the chemical damage this must be doing to my brain, now I will never find the meaning of life all due to the creatures multiplying in my drinking water.