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Friday, April 7, 2017

Beach Bums with Aunt Sweetie, and the New Hoe

Last year Ms. Sweetie came with me and the kids to the beach and her and my son while building in the sand broke the hoe sand toy. So for his birthday she bought a new sand bucket set with a bigger, stronger hoe. It is now the revolving joke with beach trips and us. I don’t really like going to the beach on the weekend, its often way too crowded but we went early, before the big crowds were out and we left by 1 the perfect time to get us all out of the sun and get my tired Little Rose down for a nap. My Little Cricket loved helping me drag our big wagon of stuff to our selected set up site. We had a great time, it’s always so nice to have two of us tag teaming the kids.

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Thursday, April 6, 2017

Sometimes I think that I should give up the blog

Sometimes I think that it would be easier to just be ordinary
to not push myself too hard
it would be nice to be ordinary
to be uncomplicated
to be simple

I would give anything for my world to be simple right now

but its not
its complicated
Its grey
its messy

But then I think that I love it. That it is soothing. That it is cathartic. That it is a living breathing journal of my life and my thoughts.

… and I cannot give up.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Group Eating Disorder Therapy

And here I am two months into personal therapy and I get cajoled into joining a group therapy. Hell if I am going to personal therapy I may as well deepen my torture and try group therapy too. It can only kill me…. Shoot me.

Anyways. I hate therapy. I don’t want to go. And I sure as hell don’t want to go to group therapy either. But I am messed up. And if I want to get better. If I want to work through some of the stuff I just spin about and cannot for the life of me figure out myself then here I am. Doing something I hate. So I can get better.

I have several issues.
I am a perfectionist
I am a black and white thinker
I have a win or lose mentality
I am a mental whipper to get myself to do things
I like to push myself hard for the things I want

So here I am trying to fix my eating and attempting to work on my underlying issues.

As if we don’t have enough therapy and appointments in our lives right now. SIGH.

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Tuesday, April 4, 2017

My Little Cricket’s Delay: Dr. G Developmental Peditrician Checkup

DECEMBER - I first stepped into Dr. G’s office I was terrified and looking for answers.

JANUARY The second time I came to her office I was told that my son didn’t have autism but that he had issues that needed help. We worked on a plan and then I left with a whirlwind of work to do.

JANUARY - The third time I came. I was tentative. I had listened to so much of the specialists around me. I had digested her plan. And I came to the office to basically get her approval for what I wanted to do. I was testing my wings and I was afraid to do what I thought best. Although she didn’t agree with everything I wanted to do I left feeling more confident in my hope that I was making the best decisions that I could.

JUNE – The fourth visit I felt comfortable and relatively confident about our path and the progress my Little Cricket was making. We spoke at length about his progress, about the various tests he has been given recently, about his genetic diagnosis, about how much better he is doing. She ran some additional tests with him and concluded that he as doing fantastic. One thing that she has been pushing from the very beginning is to get my Little Cricket in preschool everyday with a shadow. So she was over the moon that I had finally found a preschool that I liked and that I had my Little Cricket enrolled to start this fall. I am still worried about him going to school but I love the school we found, I love and trust the therapist he is going to school with AND I now feel like he has gained enough language and skills to not be COMPLETELY out of his element. I am glad I waited. It’s the hardest thing, to go with your gut when specialists are telling you to do something.

I left comfortable with where we are, and I don’t think we will need to see this doctor that often anymore. Just for yearly checkups. And that makes me happy. I got this.

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Monday, April 3, 2017

My Little Cricket’s Delay: Week 11 – Sequential Oral Sensory

We are still working on the food thing and although it is going really well in some areas I am still frustrated with our progress. My Little Cricket still wont touch any of the foods that are on our target list. I just wish this kid would eat meat.

- granola
- fried zucchini
- zucchini
- pickles
- banana
- apple
- apple sauce
- dried apples
- naked juice: protein zone

Sunday, April 2, 2017

My Little Rose: 46 Weeks Old

You my darling, beautiful, spunky little girl are a HOT MESS. You are teething like crazy and it is making you just a tiny bit cranky. And you aren’t sleeping. And I am not really a person that does well with interrupted sleep all night long, apparently you aren’t either. So maybe I should correct that to be that we were both a hot mess right now.

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Other than those moments when you aren’t, you are generally a super happy baby. Of course you try to eat everything which is a hard stage for both you and me. I am constantly pulling things out of your mouth. I hand you flash cards to look at and for me to talk about when changing your diaper at the changing station in your room. This week you started trying to eat your flash cards. It would be ok if it ended there but we have to be constantly on the lookout because anything that you can either reach and/or fit into your mouth its going in. Paper is a particular favorite.

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You are now crab crawling all over the place and you are getting fast. Its so cute to see you waddling around with your butt up in the air. Makes me smile every single time you do it.



One of your teeth finally poked through and I am loving your new snaggle tooth smile. It is adorable and infectious and fills me with 10,000 worlds of joy.

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I am loving having a little girl all the pink and the clothes make me happy. Of course we are sharing a wardrobe with ms pool shark, so you already pretty much have a full wardrobe covered. But then I cannot help myself and I get a ‘few’ more things. The adorableness is too much!

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You got the last of your birthday presents this week from your Aunt Sweetie. She came over for some baby snuggles and some time with me. Your brother, your constant sidekick helped show you how to take the paper out. And you just copied him beautifully. I love that you two are getting along so well and will grow up together.

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You have so much personality, SO MUCH. You are loud, you are happy, you want what you want exactly when you want it. You adore cuddles and your emotions are so FIERCE. I love what a little firecracker you are, you remind me so much of me.

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This week you pulled out old man face, something your father adored teaching to your brother, and that he adored apparently teaching you. I was eating breakfast with you one morning, your father had already gone to bed, and you pulled out this face…. Oh daddy is gonna get it when he gets home. Too cute!


Saturday, April 1, 2017

Happy Father’s Day

As per our usual fathers day gift we gave dad a new photo for his best dad picture frame and a lovely card. For breakfast dad wanted a crepe from the farmers market. We are so lucky to have him in our lives. Best daddy ever.

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